Getting Seuss-ed!

As many know, we've recently moved to a new house.  We started talking it up to Kevin to get him excited about the move and ease any transition anxiety.
We planned to move Kevin from his converted crib into a real bed with the move, so decided to really talk up how exciting it would be for him to get a brand new bedroom.  We gave him several options for the design: Cars, Mickey Mouse, dinosaurs, rocket ships, pirates....and he chose Dr. Seuss. 

After lots of searching, and not wanting the room to look like the great doctor vomited his paraphenalia all over the room, I found some Dr. Seuss ABC sheets, a couple of themed pillows, and a striped comforter that looks like the Cat in the Hat's hat.

I also found removable wall decals with Dr. Seuss characters, and had a quote designed for the wall above the bed.

Less than a week after moving in, the room was painted in the colors Kevin chose (it was originally a disgusting shade of pink), and the walls were decorated.

I have to say that I'm pretty impressed with myself and how it came together.  I love it when I have a vision and it actually turns out that way I saw it in my head!

Now.....just to get the other rooms in the house done....

 View of the newly painted wall, and quote above the bed.

 Vinyl wall decals with Dr. Seuss characters.

 The full set up (kid included)

The finished  big boy bed



Party Planning

Flash back to January 2012:   Warning from my husband, "Don't let this party get out of control."

He was referring to my son's 3rd birthday party.  Knowing how things went down for the 2nd birthday party, I do admit that he has reason for concern.  Afterall, that was an AMAZING party, and he knows my ultra-competitive spirit forces me to compete even with myself!

I'm going to save details of the 3rd birthday bash for another blog post, but am going to create a "benchmark" in this blog.  So reflecting back to April 2011.....the second birthday party....

Theme: Rock N Roll
Invitations:  Guitar cut-outs inviting friends and family to come and Rock N Roll with the birthday boys. (Kevin shared his party with his BFF, Alex, as their birthdays are only one day apart.)
Venue: Clubhouse at local Country Club
Entertainment: Mr. Marc the Music Man (a popular figure in the toddler circles) and decorate-your-own guitars for the kids
Cakes:  One guitar shaped cake, and one drum shaped cake
Food: 3 ft sub, meatballs, ziti, chicken nuggets, chips
Favors: Guitar bags filled with inflatble guitars, bubbles shaped like microphones, rock n roll tattoos, whistles, and rock star sunglasses.
Guests: 50 people, friends and family

It took two hours to set up, and three cars to haul presents home.  We have videos of Mr. Marc that Kevin still watches one year later. 
We coordinated his birthday portraits to include a guitar. 
Overall, one of the best parties that we've ever been to - but still a chance to top it for the 3rd birthday celebration!

 All of the kids decorating their own guitars.

 Alex's guitar birthday cake.

 The favor bags plus custom printed M&Ms for the adults.

 Kevin's guitar birthday cake.

 The table decorations (of course, guitar shaped bowls of M&Ms on every table!)

Front row seats to Mr. Marc.



The Nanny Diaries...

As many know, we made the decision not to put Kevin back in daycare after his femur fracture.  There's too many risks right now, and the large classroom didn't fit our vision for what is right for him right now.
So I decided to look for a nanny to come to our home and stay with him during the day. 
There were a few things that were very important to us when selecting our nanny:
1 - Must have at least an associate's degree in early childhood education
2 - Must be willing to take on an energetic toddler who needs some special attention
3 - Can do playtime and classroom time
4 - Gives our son the support he needs at home, and is NOTHING like us

Kevin gets a lot of our personality at home, so finding someone who is opposite from us will give him a different kind of nurturing.
We were lucky to find someone who met all of our needs.  Sarah is an ESU grad, who spent years teaching 3 to 5 year olds in early intervention programs.  When the state of PA cut funding, she was laid off, and is currently going back to school in the evening for her masters.
As I tell people about her, I find my refering to her as "our nanny" and I gotta tell you, it feels very weird to say that.  It is a pretty significant expense, and therefore implies that we have a lot of money (which we don't!).  Talking about "our nanny" also feels a little snobby, but referring to her as "the babysitter" doesn't give her the credit for the work she doing to continue her education.
I'm also SO aware of what she thinks of us.  I read the book and saw the movie, and I don't want to be "Mrs. X" to her!  So as much as I want to be her friend, I also realize that she's kind of an employee.  It's an interesting dynamic that I didn't think about before deciding to go down the nanny route. 
I'm sure it's all in my head, because she seems very comfortable with us, our friends, and in our home.  I guess what I should go for is to make her part of our little family since she is spending so much time with the most important family member.

Why him?

My son was born with a health condition that he is going to be challenged with his entire life.  Whew - I said it.  That's our dark, dirty secret.  It's the information that I share with selective family members and close friends.  It's on a need-to-know basis, and so far, we've found very few people who need to know.  I won't go into more detail about his health condition; this IS a public blog and the information will be his to share publically when he's older, or to decide not to share at all.  

We knew at my 36 week ultrasound that something wasn't right.  We didn't realize just how bad it was until he was about 8 months old.  For the past 26 months, my husband and I have asked each other "Why him?", "Why us?", "What did we do to deserve this?" and we don't have any answers. How is it fair that this loving, brilliant, gifted, perfect child has been given this to deal with in his life?  And how are we supposed to talk to him about this and let him know that his life may not be as long as ours?  We don't have answers to these questions either.

I've asked God "why" so many times that, like all parents, He's probably tuned me out now. He's not interested in answering that question for me...at least not yet. 

It wasn't until recently when I started looking back at all of the events leading to now, and thought that maybe I was seeing it all wrong.  Instead of thinking about why God would take my son away from us too early, maybe I should be grateful for having any time with him at all.

If the doctors hadn't ordered the ultrasound at 36 weeks and caught the first sign of an issue, one or both of us wouldn't have survived the delivery.  But they caught it.

When my son was born, he couldn't breathe or eat and was sent to the NICU for a week.  If the nurses and doctors at Lehigh Valley Hospital hadn't taken helped him, he wouldn't have survived the first hours or days of his life.  But they did.

So I have him....for now.  I know I'll still ask "why" and I don't expect an answer.  But as we share more with family and friends, I also know that the volume on the prayers is getting louder.  If love and prayers can heal, then my son will be ok.

Discovering who are true friends are

There are times in our lives when we realize who around us is really important in our lives.  For me, it often comes in times when I need help or when something has gone horribly wrong in my life.  My family has had to face a "road bump" over the past two weeks - certainly not the first or the last one for us - but unexpected and poorly timed all the time.
It's in this time, that I've realized how much family and friends care about my family - and seen which friends are the ones I can truly count on.
On the two hour ambulance ride from Pocono Medical Center to Children's Hospital of Philadelphia, it was my friend Heather that I was texting for support.  It was Heather who texted me every few hours over the next three days while I camped out in my son's hospital room to check in, and send him a Sponge Bob balloon that showed us the first smile we'd seen in days.
It was my friend Courtney who sent me messages to check in, and helped my co-workers send a bunch of balloons to my son when we were sent home from CHoP.  My friend Kelly sent a "Not Bored Anymore" jar from Land of Nod full of crafts and activities to keep my son entertained.  My parents and father-in-law all sent books.  My sister and her husband brought coloring books, puzzles, and movies. My fabulous sister-in-law thrilled my son with a box of stickers and toys. My friend Carolyn stopped by with toys, and then with a delicous homemade dinner for my family.  This doesn't even take into account the text messages and emails that we get daily to check in and see how we're doing. And it's not about what people brought or sent - it's that so many people took the time to show that they care and to give support to us. 
This is amazing to me, because for years while living here, Joe and I found it so hard to make friends as adults.  Sure, we had friends from work, but nothing like the friendships that we had and saw our parents have as we grew up in a small town.  But now I realize how wrong we were.  We do have a support network here - it's just sad that it takes a bad time to show us the good.

The Ultimate Throwdown: Daycare Teacher Gift Giving

I admit it:  I AM COMPETITIVE.  There, I said it.  Are you surprised?  Well, for anyone who knows me, I would be really surprised if that was a shocking revelation. Give me any contest or competition, regardless of the size of the prize, and I will show up ready to WIN.

But since enrolling my son in his daycare, I've come across a type of competition that had previously been foreign to me.  It's the heated, yet unspoken, competition among us parents to see who can give the teachers the best presents.  In fact, is it so underground, that I didn't know about this competition until I was sadly embarrassed by other parents during the Christmas of 2009. 

While I was recovering from that brutal beating, I was quickly thrown back down because I didn't realize that this gift giving craze applies to EVERY school occasion and holiday:  Easter, St. Patrick's Day, Valentine's Day, Halloween, Graduation, Teacher Appreciation WEEK, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years....and the list goes on and on.  I'm sure that you can imagine my surprise as I was carrying a child, bottles, sheets, and a stuffed backpack into my son's classroom on a windy March day, and came face to face with a very smug Supermom who had just dropped off St. Patrick's Day gifts for the classroom's teachers.  The bags alone must have taken her hours to make; hand decorated with cut-out shamrocks, ribbons, and just the right amount of glitter as to not look too tacky.  I could hear the oooo's and ahhhh's as the teachers opened the gifts that Martha Stewart herself would have been envious of.  I quickly dropped off my son and left with my head hung in defeat, vowing to myself that I would never be caught unarmed again.

I'm proud to say that I'm making a strong comeback and now I'm consistently in the running for the top gift.  In fact, I can even claim one victory.

Picture this:  Toddler 1 Graduation. April 2011. Some parents gave chocolates, others gave homemade cards complete with personalized toddler coloring, and of course the apple-for-teacher theme was very popular.  I took this one to an entirely new level, shocking the parental competition with my creativity and earning the virtual crown from the Best Gift pageant.  I traced Kevin's feet with black marker, and then we spent time coloring a set of feet together for each teacher.  I cut out the footprints, and sat down to put my poetry skills to work.  After three drafts, I was satisfied with my prose:

For the past year, I've kept you on your toes,

but I better teacher, I couldn't have chose.

I've learned my numbers, letters, and lots of new stuff.

Mommy, Daddy, and I can't thank you enough.

Now it's time for you to relax and take a seat,

and pamper your very tired feet.

And do this, I attached a gift certificate for each teacher to get a pedicure at my favorite local spa.   Ahhhh.....the taste of Victory!

Christmas 2010 gifts had a very cute theme for the younger teachers we had at the time.  I gave Philosophy's peppermint hand lotion, and hot cocoa lip gloss, with a peppermint bark dipped in chocolate.  It was a very cute presentation, wrapped in an hand-made, origami coffee mug.

I made a decent showing for Halloween this year, but I know it wasn't my best effort: Personalized orange, white, and black M&Ms wrapped in a Halloween themed embroidered hand towel.  Very cute, but no points for originality.

And even as I sit here and type this "confession" I really do wonder if this is just a competition between the parents, or if the teachers really do pick the "winner."  I'm 99.8% certain that the teachers don't play favorites with the kids based on the gifts they get....but just to cover the risk around that .2%, I'm starting to plan the Christmas gifts now!

I'm so proud of you....

As I was getting ready for work on Wednesday morning, my little man came up to me and hugged my legs.  He looked up at me and said "I so proud of you, Mommy."

It melted my heart.

And brought tears to my eyes.

Obviously we're using a lot of positive reinforcement with potty training (I get a round of applause every time I pee...), but it was the first time that Kevin gave me the praise that I've been giving him. 

And while it was the first time that he's ever said that back to me, it really did get me thinking.  How is it that my toddler is proud of me, and I am not satisfied?  My husband says it best:  "Johnna, you always have to keep moving on to something new.  New car. New house. New job.  Nothing is every good enough for you to just enjoy."  

Even so, it took a toddler to point it out to me.  I need to stop and reflect, so I can step back and look at everything that I've done in my career, my marriage, and as a mother....and just be PROUD of myself.