Fear of Flying

With a job that requires that requires me to travel, it’s hard to believe that I still get nervous about getting on an airplane.  And I will admit that it has gotten worse since my son was born.  I don’t know if it feels like I have so much more to lose now (not that I didn’t value my husband and family before), or that I can’t even think of my baby growing up without me. Although I do realize that financially, I’m worth more dead than alive thanks to a great life insurance policy!!  (This is something I don’t advertise to my husband!!)

My first international flight was eight months after my son was born.  It was a trip to Brussels for work, and I had a panic attack on the plane.  I remember sitting on my seat on that plane in Newark, awaiting take-off, and my palms were actually sweating.  It’s not an expression – it actually happens!  I felt dizzy and had to work really hard to breath.  If I could have gotten out of my seat and run to the door, I would have, but I had an irrational fear of being tackled by an air marshall – plus my legs would move.  All I could do was sit there and recite the Lord’s Prayer.  

I’ve flown around the US a lot (and even done flights alone with my toddler!), but there was something about going over water that makes me extremely nervous.  If there are engine problems on a plane from Newark to Chicago, the plane could lane at another airport.  But if we’re over the Atlantic Ocean, then we’re going down.    

But I like numbers and facts, so I did some research.   Did you know that according to the US government, 95.7 percent of the passengers involved in aviation accidents make it out alive?  That's right. When the National Transportation Safety Board studied accidents between 1983 and 2000 involving 53,487 passengers, they found that 51,207 survived. That's 95.7 percent. When you exclude crashes in which no one had a chance of surviving - like Pan Am 103 - the NTSB says the survival rate in the most serious crashes is 76.6 percent. In other words, if your plane crashes, you aren't necessarily doomed, just like the passengers on US Air 1549 in the Hudson.

All this is somewhat comforting. But you know what?  Tomorrow morning on my flight from London Heathrow to Newark, I will still be saying the Lord’s Prayer before we take off.